03/01/26

[seasidefics]

yesterday was a bit better than the last few days. though i did make an entry about hating angry men, which still stands, but then #he was nice to me and i felt guilty for venting, so i privated it. anyways, i went out for a bit and got ding tea afterwards. so it really does prove that exposure therapy works, and getting sun and doing things to keep your mind preoccupied work. i hate that. although whenever i do something, i think about my dad and start tearing up. like when we got boba, i was just thinking about the last time we did that together... sharing a large mango slush, and it suddenly hits that i’ll never do that again, and i’m just surrounded by people who still have their parents.

so anything positive i feel is quickly derailed with grief, but isn’t that how it works?

we basically just window-shopped and then got the boba and taiwanese popcorn chicken, which my sister had really been wanting to try, so it was a nice opportunity and made her happy! though i’m the only one who could take the heat (i think she just got medium spice, and it really wasn’t that hot, but everyone else disagreed. maybe eating a bunch of buldak flavors has upped my spice tolerance).

i also got a new flavor, as i’m trying to do that any time i stop by a tea place, and i got winter melon. although i got nervous ordering and forgot to add milk, so it was just plain tea. i liked it, but it didn’t taste like any of the reviews i read. it wasn’t that sweet where it’s sickening, and it just tasted like taro to me? like a nutty vanilla. i didn’t get any graham cracker like the reddit users said. maybe because it wasn’t milk tea?

here’s my ding tea and uno tea house drink ranking (not that anyone cares):

s tier: honeydew, fresh strawberry milk

a tier: thai tea, classic milk tea, hokkaido coffee slush

b tier: strawberry yakult slush (too tangy), taro milk tea (sometimes it’s really good, other times bad... depends on the place and the person making it), winter melon tea, mango slush (not the biggest mango fan)

c tier: anything matcha (just not a fan)

brother also kind of cleared out the garage and redid the little workout section. i’m thinking about using it when he’s at work on weekdays, as i really need to start treating my body better and tone up. it’s funny that i’m seen as the “strong one” ( that’s what being a tall girl gets you in my family) but i think my younger sister is stronger than me nowadays. i couldn’t even move the bar the slightest, and it only had 50 pounds altogether. i low-key think i strained myself just from doing that, because my front ribs are sore whenever i move a certain way, so that’s not good.